It is only 9:00pm January 1, 2018 and I am starving!

It is only 9:00 pm on January 1, 2018 and I am starving. Yes, I am “one of those” people who plan to eat better in this new year. No more soda in the house, all I can think about is eating the chocolate I have stashed in the pantry for “emergency only” times where I just cannot bear it. It hasn’t even been 24 hours and I am already craving food because I know I should not have it. I could very well sneak a bite and no one would know, kids are in bed, husband is napping on the couch…I could pull it off.

Dinner tonight was interesting, we made our son sit at the table for about 20 minutes after dinner to finish eating all his vegetables. This was nothing less then entertainment at its finest, the girls were sitting around watching and anticipating every gag reflex he had and then laughed it off only to wait for the next bite to bring living hell to the poor boy. While I was staying firm with my husband on this new way of eating for him, all I wanted to do was scoop him up and baby cradle the poor boy (yah.. he is 12). After sending the girls away from the live drama, he finally finished them all. A small step in the right direction.

Taking that into consideration I probably should not raid my chocolate stash…I should throw it away. The guilt of eating it after already pushing my son over the ledge would be to much for me to live with. So instead, I will hop on Pinterest and check out some cool/hip water bottles or jugs to label the massive levels of water I will be drinking tomorrow.

Proverbs 16:2-3 states: All the ways of man are clean in his own sight, But the Lord weighs the motives. Commit your works to the Lord and your plans will be established.

This passage is so full of New Year resolution goodness I can barely stand it. We have to remember that our human responsibility is always subject to God’s absolute sovereignty. We trick ourselves into thinking something is good, when God knows my true motive is to eat the delicious sinful chocolate that is not allowed. I made a commitment to myself, my family and my God. As arbitrary as my example of my battle with eating a small chocolate is, this can also be applied to all our trials and challenges in life we try to validate as “OK”.  We must commit ourselves to being in Gods word to decipher his will for our lives. We must communicate in prayer what God already knows about us, and ask for help and strength. Thank him for the many blessings in our lives, and commit ourselves into acquiring wisdom through a teachable spirit. A spirit that does not live in fear of removing things we think we love and need in our lives. If it is not God’s will for us to have them, we must lean on him to make us strong enough to remove them completely. Even if it is not the “popular” opinion. What greater gift can we give our God then to show him how committed we are to living our lives for him?

I encourage you to comment below, one of your favorite verses for achieving your goals.





What do You Choose?


I would not consider waking up early a joy or a blessing, nor would anyone around me feel that I express that emotion. I also don’t feel like the “to do” list that continues to grow is comforting me let alone anyone else. I would consider my nights to be almost more burdening then the length of my long days. How many of you suffer from the mood altering thoughts of your preparation for the next day? It could be motherly duties, work projects or deadlines, coaching tasks, finances or sickness to name just a few. Then, right when you think you have it all planned out, you lay in bed and are completely immersed by your brain working as hard as your body physically worked throughout the daytime hours. This is the nagging reality of life when you have too many commitments, and not enough strength to let some of them go. The time I am laying in bed can be time used to read my bible, devotion or just pray. Sure, easier said than done right?

Often In the storm of everyday life we forget how important finding and feeling pure joy really is. Sure, I feel blessed in all of my daily tasks no matter how hard or lengthy they may be. I thank God every day for my role I play in children’s/teens lives. Sometimes the thoughts of rejection, fear, inadequacy and failure try to wriggle their way into my joy.  One of the powers and gifts God has given us is the ability to choose. The fact that sometimes I choose these emotions over joy is an indication I am not spending enough time talking with God. When you look up the definition of joy it states: a feeling of great happiness, something or someone that gives joy to someone. I feel joy is a function of giving gratitude, or thanks. Joy is a choice.

A few years ago at a Women of Faith conference I wrote down a quote from Ann Voskamp “Life is not an emergency, life is a gift” this was something that hit me pretty hard. Conviction is like one of those annoying pains that kind of feel’s good in a bad way. This quote is a perfect testimony to my daily struggle with finding my joy. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 states “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. What a powerful way of punching me in the stomach with God’s incredible word. The burdens I spoke of above are only burdens because I have chosen to find comfort in those tasks and not God’s word. The negative, hurtful thoughts I sometimes feel are also a choice I am making. Obviously by now you are getting the main idea…I am not making the right choices. Tonight as I write my feelings down, continue to study scripture and pray for God to help guide me in all my choices I will focus on one powerful word..and it is not joy this time. Tonight, I choose Eucharisteo. For those of you who are not familiar with this term. Eucharisteo is a Greek Verb meaning, Giving Thanks To God. I choose to give thanks to God in all circumstances as 1 Thessalonians 5:18 states. I choose Eucharisteo, do you?

I am a Christian, married; mother of 3..I am pretty dangerous.

Today, the day before Election Day I awoke feeling empowered.  My feelings of empowerment are not motivated by trusting that my voice will actually be heard this voting season. See, I am a Christian, married; mother of 3 who teaches at a private Christian school. I am all too often cast into the unrealistic dark shadows of society.  I mean I am pretty dangerous…I believe in One Man One Women, Abortion is Murder, Pro Death Penalty, Small Government, Anti Union, The Right To Bear Arms…heck I am even Pro Pledge Of Allegiance…I could go on and on. Whew, now that I have some of your feathers in a ruffle, how about an attack on Common Core ideals?

Living in Oregon, opening my ballot is nothing but discouraging. The fact that every candidate I can vote on upholds absolutely no moral values that align with mine. It sure makes it hard to pencil in a bubble beside any name at all. Moving on to the ballot measures only makes my already low blood pressure rise through the roof. Every measure is not an improvement, it’s a disgrace. Unfortunately, “empowered” is not a feeling I had at that moment in time. My RIGHT to vote felt like a punishment, I had a flashback of when I was younger and slammed my door behind me when my parents grounded me. There was no way out of the punishment, I just had to figure out how to deal with it and move on. So as I sit here having already turned in my ballot over a week ago, I think of those of you women who have not voted yet. Those of you women who are just like me, discouraged at today’s world, and their view of Godly women who care for their families above their incomes or career.”Liberated” women are not afraid to shut down our vote; they have become a worldly voice for young women. Let today, the day before Election Day be your empowerment day!

Empower other women in not being afraid to vote when they are feeling defeated already. Empower them to be proud of their lifestyle and priorities. Empower them to share their faith in God and love for family.

We may not be able to get the majority vote, but you may change a life or a view and bring confidence to a women’s life that needs it desperately. Don’t give up on your voice, your faith, your family and your morals. Share this if you are EMPOWERED!


Barefoot, Uphill In The Snow…

How easy we can loose touch of what seems so clear to us in the beginning. I believe there are seasons where we are more inspired then others. How quickly we can get off the beaten path. This whole idea of loosing your path is very discouraging. I completely switch paths sometimes feeling motivated to go down another path that may need a bit more clear then the one I am currently on…then I just find out after traveling the road for a short while around the first turn is a sign saying road closed! How many of you ladies out there feel like God is playing a game of where is waldo with your path…you know where it is…you see it… you start going for it…and then POW it is gone. Then we must begin our journey again.

This is where I believe that I may have read the map or road sign wrong. God’s plan for my life may not even be to take the road…it was probably to walk…barefooted uphill in the snow ;). I seem to inadvertently pick easy street, not the path less traveled.

Currently, I have realized that I am avoiding my dreams due to the fact I feel like it will take me barefooted uphill in the snow. Not to mention the huge crowd of people beside me reminding me how short my legs are, how out of shape I am and how ugly my feet are. How many of you feel the same way?

I constantly have to remind myself that regular prayer, reading my bible, communicating with my spouse and prayer requests will only open up my path God had intended for me. The fact that I have to remain patient is a whole other battle I could write about.

Proverbs 3:6 states “In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Straight to me means clear, open, and direct. Isaiah 41:13 also says ” For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” How much more do I need to trust the fact that if I choose a future or task that is difficult and goes against the grain of the world and its dark ways, that my God will be right beside me.

I encourage you to look at your path in life and decide which road you are on. Is it glorifying God, and using your talents he has gifted you with? Are you in constant prayer and devotion? Are you communicating with people in your church or family so they can pray with you and for you? I know often enough how difficult it is to find the answer, we just need to listen a little harder.

Quite possibly we need to embrace the cold snow upon our feet, encourage others to do the same. Although initially uncomfortable your feet adjust to the temperature 😉


All Over Coffee In A Corner Booth

All Over Coffee In A Corner Booth




The strong aroma of fresh coffee and maple syrup; drifted by our small corner booth. All while my youngest daughter and I were enjoying an early morning breakfast before a doctor appointment. It’s not often I get to spend one on one time with my children, but when I do…I seize the moment. Our waitress seemed to be struggling with meeting the demands of all her customers, frazzled she accidently burns the corner of my hand while pouring my second cup of coffee. She instantly apologized as I checked to make sure my hand was still functional, I told her everything was fine. Glancing up at her with a smile of reassurance that I was indeed alright, I noticed her concerned face and the start of what looked like a tear welling in her eye.  She turned away and disappeared into the kitchen.

Turning to my daughter whom was so deeply concentrated on her picture she was coloring, I couldn’t help but overhear the conversation going on in the booth behind ours. There were two men with shiny silver hair combed back smoothly in their golden ages with a nicely folded newspaper lying between them. Conversing about health insurance, medical conditions & their late wives I couldn’t help but concentrate on their tone. Obviously, with one having high blood pressure and the other battling cancer I would think that they would be full of sadness or anger, maybe even bitterness. Instead they spoke with a firm but joyous tone, of their lives that lie ahead of them.  Just as I was trying to listen more my daughter accidentally placed her arm in my pancake, which means sticky maple syrup coated her entire arm and shirt sleeve. Sighing as if it were the last blow I could take this morning I started cleaning her up and giving her the speech of how she needs to pay attention more. I mean seriously, she is 3 and a half..right?

The morning was a typical morning in the Willamette Valley, which meant it consisted of some kind of precipitation. Our booth was nestled in the corner up against a window facing the busy road. Glancing through the droplets on the pane of glass I began looking at the clouds starting to break up. I was trying to plan my getaway, I mean we may just melt if we get wet walking out to the car. Just as I was busy making my decision a powder blue minivan pulled up in front of my window. A van this large can haul up to 8 passengers, yet there was only one inside. An older lady was driving; whose hair almost reminded me of my late grandmother Katie’s. White, short and full of large curls as if she just had came back from the salon. Slowly exiting her driver’s seat she reached back and pulled out a large walker, she seemed to be struggling a bit but ended up maneuvering it out all by her lonesome. Scooting up slowly to the entrance my waitress opened the doors graciously for her to get in and out of the rain. “One” she motioned with her hand to the hostess who escorted her to her table. Paying no attention to my daughter, I noticed she had been licking the syrup out of the cup with her finger. This time I looked at her and paused, I began to tear up, not a sigh left my mouth as it did before, no frustration, just joy and thankfulness filled my heart. Obviously, she is not used to me reacting this way so her look of concern back at me was full of a different emotion, possibly intimidation, confusion, or fear.

This early morning visit to Denny’s could be viewed a few different ways. One would be that the purpose of even being here in the first place was to spend some time with my daughter, which I failed at miserably.  Another thought would be what a depressing morning I created, I mean a waitress that is in -competent and cannot even pour me a cup of coffee. Combine that with being surrounded by all these older people I have nothing in common with, a daughter who is not following any direction, all while the dreary weather surrounded the diner bringing us even deeper into our depressions. All of these examples are single thoughts that ran randomly through my head in my corner booth over coffee.

Feeling overwhelmed with emotion, I immediately missed my husband and other 2 kids. My mom and dad, In laws, sisters and brothers, nieces and nephews, grandparents, aunts and uncles and friends all went through my mind. Here I am stressing about sticky syrup, a 3 year old, the weather and my coffee, when all of what matters in life is passing me by. Every minute in that old corner booth will be engraved into my brain forever. The waitress who struggled at her job, may be worrying about something so much bigger then serving me breakfast and pouring me coffee. The two older men sitting behind me speaking of how life used to be, their declining health and their deceased wives made me feel guilt as I was just minutes ago reacting to a 3 year olds arm in my pancake like it was the end of the world. Never to forget the lone lady exiting her empty minivan in the rain, scooting into the diner with pride, confidence and hair done up just like my late grandmothers. The morning wasn’t depressing it was inspiring, eye opening and a true lesson from God. All over coffee in a corner booth on a rainy morning.

I Must Pull My Head Out Of The Mud & Carry On!

Lately I have been doing a lot of soul searching, in the midst of how crazy the world is changing, how quick my kids seem to be growing and how much of a passion I obtain for speaking God’s word, specifically to women and mothers. I have many goals that are ever changing, but the wonderful aspect about the way they are changing is that they are all becoming heavy on my heart to complete.

My days are full of up’s and downs of daily life, things change minute after minute. I get discouraged often, I can almost feel the devil tripping me up and stomping my face into the mud. Sometimes I think I should just give up, as much of my dreams are so time consuming, detailed and seem so far away. Then the other day I came across these words of wisdom…



Then I begin to contemplate if my dreams are just wishes I cannot achieve…I loose focus on the dreams and focus on the fact that these are just wishes left un-granted… My vision needs to focus more on the Dream…

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Lastly, I need to realize to achieve my best I need to take it step by step, figuring out I cannot accomplish it in a small amount of time. In this journey, I should be the driver not the passenger.

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Sometime’s I find it funny that I want to be an inspiration to women out there, when I am constantly seeking wisdom from others. Can I  be a great leader, speaker, and writer when I feel part of me is still broken in ways? I guess the answer to that will show in my future..but first I need to pull my head out of that mud and carry on, knowing I have a God that believes in me and you.

Do You Believe The Perception Of Beauty Is A Moral Test?




How do you feel about this quote? I completely believe that beauty is a perception issue, that lies on your moral beliefs. Over the past few days I have read many postings and opinions on Victoria Secrets new line titled “Bright Young Things”. This is after spending last Saturday with my 12 year old daughter at a Revolve Tour put on by Women of Faith. I came out of this day with so many amazing notes and insight on how my daughter thinks, what she is prone to think and society’s take on how she should behave or dress. I also walked away with a new sense of how amazing we should make our daughters feel. Christa Black was one of the speakers that had an amazing testimony on how teen’s see themselves, and how she overcame such large obstacles in her life. She spoke the meaning of unconditional love, and how we all crave love as women and how “you are what you think”. Her words rang so true, if you have people you love and care about “bathing” them in lovely truths about themselves (she calls these truth baths) they are going to know they are worthy of love, even if some people don’t treat them like it or if society doesn’t label what you are wearing as “fashionable or sexy”. Telling the young women around you how wonderful, beautiful, smart, joyous and lovable they are is “worth more then gold” as Britt Nicole would say. 

I would say that reading the articles that have been written in the press about this new VS line surprised me, but it didn’t. I could blame that company for putting these products out there for my two daughters to be tempted to purchase, or my young son to observe and worship..but I am not. I could talk all day about how the media and retail industries thrive on the innocence of these young ladies and men but it is old news. My bottom line is this will not stop, it will only get worse. Call it a bad attitude, a losing mentality or laziness…the line needs to be drawn with the parents educating their children on these issues. To build up there moral character, teach them right from wrong, show them that that attention is not flattering to them. Bring them up in an environment where they know their worth and that they are WORLD CHANGERS. All of our children will be tempted at points in their life, but it will be what they are brought up to believe that will influence them to make the right choices, choices God has influenced them to make. I believe you will behave according to what you believe on the most part, do you?

I will close with this last question..that will let you reflect on this issue more personally.